Freedom

Had a little chat with my cousin that brought back so much memories to me. How the slightest bit of freedom was not even given to me. 

In the past, reaching home at 8 was off limits for me. Having countless of quarrels every single week, it's mostly due to me going home late. What was not understood by my mum was that my school's around an hour plus journey back home, and plus school usually end late. On days without CCA, I was demanded to reach home by 5, when school ends at 335. Awesome. 

Negotiated and I even had a written contract ( with both of our signatures ) on what time I must be home EVERY SINGLE DAY, like example, home by 7.30pm on Tuesdays. Imagined how suffocated I felt, and how much I yearned for freedom. I even had a rule which was ridiculous. I only could go out like once a month. ( outings etc ), so having like maybe 2 friends birthday falling on the same month, I had to only choose one of them to celebrate with them. 

Things like this ruined relationships between me and my mum. Having these kind of restrictions also caused me to not be able to hang out with friends after school. ( lucky these stopped when I came to the mid of sec 4 going to sec 5 ). Even Cheryl had to head down to tiong barhu to study for O's with me because my mum would not let me head far away to study. No one believed me when I told them I had no freedom at all in the past, seeing how much freedom I have now. 

Sometimes parents think that that's the best thing for us, but in actual fact, these little concerns to them, are actually the main factors in causing us to be really depressed. 

Breaking this barrier of doubt my mum had on me was the hardest thing I could've done, but also the best thing. Communicating with my mum now does not end up in quarrels like how it always did. Being able to confide in her in some things and sometimes even talking about the future was something I had never ever expected to happen. ( but it did ) 

Introducing her to my friends and assuring her I'm not out with bad company was one of the main factors of her being able to put her trust on me. ( she never ever objects to me going out with Cheryl ). 

At the end of the day, sometimes one may think that what their parents are doing are trying to ruin their life( which in some truth, it is ), but in actual fact, everything they do is actually for the sake of you, and one of the forms of them showing their care and love for you. 

Negotiate, Give in, Embrace it. 

Sorry can't help but melt when I see my parents holding hands. 

I look really weird & it's a 2 months ago throwback photo so.. But yeah. 

Goodbye!